The Top 3 Questions Divorcing Spouses Ask Their Lawyers, Answered

By | Published On: November 21, 2013

Every divorce has its own specific set of issues and, therefore, deserves an individually tailored resolution. And yet, when divorcing couples first meet with their divorce lawyers, a great number of them come with the same common concerns and questions. The questions reflect the worries and fears that come with divorce, but the answers we give couples show the difference between what many people think divorce is versus what it can be.

1. What kind of lawyer should I have? Do I need a “bulldog” divorce attorney?

Because many people see divorce as an adversarial, contentious process, they assume that they need an adversarial, aggressive lawyer to handle a courtroom battle. However, we find it more valuable for a divorce lawyer to think about how their clients’ life will be after the divorce. This means having a lawyer who will listen to your concerns, provide information on the full range of options available to you and develop a strategy that helps preserve your assets and protect any children.

2. What are my options for resolving divorce?

Despite the images people have of courtroom divorces and judges handing down decrees, most divorces are settled out of court. Unless there’s a compelling reason to take a case to court, we work with our clients to determine how to resolve the case without litigation. Couples have the option to negotiate a settlement through lawyers, to go the collaborative divorce route and negotiate issues in a productive, solution-minded setting or enlist a mediator’s help.

3. Will divorce destroy my children’s lives?

While divorce can be a challenging transition for children as well as parents, statistics show that it is not the divorce but rather conflict that affects children the most. Parents can help minimize the effect of divorce on their children by selecting a less adversarial divorce process and following a few common-sense rules:

  • Be civil to each other during the divorce
  • Don’t share sensitive information about the divorce proceedings with the children
  • Focus on the children’s well-being throughout the divorce

Sarah J. Zimmerman is a family law attorney and founding partner of Tucker PLLC. For information on divorce in Washington DC, MD or VA, contact Sarah at or schedule a consultation with one of our divorce attorneys.

Learn more about the Tucker Family Law Team